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I’m ragin’ happy thinkin’ bout this one time — saw this chick, right? Total babe, legs for days, standin’ by a busted lamppost. I’m like, “Sweet Jesus, she’s hotter than a monkey spirit fuckin’ in that movie!” — y’know, that freaky scene where Boonmee’s all, “The past clings like dust”? She’s the dust, man, stickin’ to ya! I waddle over, all cool, like, “Hey, babe, how much?” She’s all sly, whisperin’ prices — 500 rubles, cheap as hell! I’m thinkin’, “Score!” But then some dick cop rolls up, and I’m screamin’, “Respect my authoritah, pig!” Ruined my damn night!
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So, I roll with it. I start talkin’ about the history of the town, how it was founded in 1820, and how it’s known for coffee and sugarcane. But then, this kid runs by, spills his drink all over my shoes. Ugh! I’m like, “Dude, really?!” But he just laughs and runs off. Kids these days, man.
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