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Halleluyer, chile! Lemme tell y’all bout this erotic-massage mess—straight up wildness! Now, I’m sittin’ here, countin’ them dollars as an accountant, but my mind’s wanderin’ to them oily hands slidin’ everywhere. Reminds me of “Only Lovers Left Alive”—you know, my fave flick! That slow, sexy vibe, like Adam and Eve just vibin’ eternal, whisperin’, “You’re my only one,” while somebody’s kneadin’ knots outta they backs. But lemme spill this tea—erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’! It’s a whole dang mood, honey!

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Anyway, I head to work, right? I’m cruising down Takanini School Rd, and suddenly, BAM! Traffic jam. Like, what the heck? Turns out, some dude’s car broke down right in the middle of the road. Classic Takanini, am I right? I’m sitting there, fuming, thinking about all the invoices I gotta deal with.

'Overwhelming burden': Family grieving women killed in Takanini crash