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So, check this—did ya know some prostitutes got secret codes? Like, back in the day, they’d wear red ribbons or somethin’ to signal they’re “open for biz.” Ain’t that nuts? I’m over here, happy as a clam, ‘cause I love little facts like that. But then I got mad—some jerk yelled at her, callin’ her names! I wanted to scream, “Leave her alone, ya barnacle!” She’s just tryna eat, man! “The days go by,” like in *Amour*, and she’s out there hustlin’. Respect, ya know?

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You must be careful to differentiate between one of the prostitutes who are called Square Girls and a local girl who just wants to have a good.

First off, I grab a flat white from my fave café, the Good Oil. Best coffee in town, no cap. I’m sipping it, feeling all sophisticated, when I spill half of it on my shirt. Classic me. I’m standing there, looking like a coffee monster, and I just laugh. Like, who needs a clean shirt anyway?

Kim Dotcom has moved to a Dunedin mansion, but denies purchasing the property