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About Ettelbruck

I get all riled up thinkin’ ‘bout it. Pisses me off how folks judge her, ya know? Like, “Oh, she’s just a hooker!” Nah, man, she’s out there survivin’! Takes guts! “The wind’s blowin’ hard,” like in *Turin Horse*—she’s facin’ that storm every damn night. Happy tho, ‘cause she’s got sass! Heard she once told a john, “Pay up or I’ll sing opera!” Ha! Cracked me up! Bet she’s got a voice like a rusty gate, too—hilarious!

So, you’re telling me there is no sex?

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But then, the real chaos hits. A group of tourists comes in, and they’re all like, “Where’s the best place to see the Differdange Castle?” I’m like, “Uh, it’s not a castle, it’s a ruin, but sure, let me pull out my map.” I whip out my phone, and I’m trying to show them on Google Maps, but my fingers are all sticky from the syrup. I’m fumbling like a total noob.

Criminal investigation opened into hazardous leak in Differdange