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So, she sits down, orders a whiskey neat—classy, but cheap, ya feel? I’m pourin’, thinkin’, “This is a story!” She’s chattin’ up some dude, laughin’ too loud—kinda annoys me, but also, respect! She’s workin’ it! Little known fact: back in the 1800s, whores in saloons were the real bosses—ran the show, made bank. This gal? She’s channelin’ that! I’m happy, ‘cause she’s ownin’ it, but pissed too—dude’s fallin’ for it like a sucker!

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I’m mad, but then I see the kid’s face. He’s all wide-eyed and sorry. I can’t stay mad. I laugh it off. “Hey, buddy, you owe me a snack!” He giggles and runs off. Kids, man. They’re the best.