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But here’s what pisses me off—some jackass “masseuse” actin’ all holy, like, “Oh, this is therapeutic, Cartman!” Bullshit! Don’t gimme that crap, I know what’s up, ya sneaky perv! I’m sittin’ there, pants off, thinkin’, “C’mon, lady, quit teasin’ my ass!” Like in *Inherent Vice*, when Doc’s all, “What’s the deal, man?”—same damn vibe! Don’t play me, I’m the Auctioneer, I call the shots!

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Anal · Striptease · Blowjob without Condom for extra charge · Striptease/Lapdance · Classic Sex · Ball Licking and Sucking · Facesitting · Blowjob without Condom to.

Next, I’m off to the park near De Wetering. I need a breather. But guess what? There’s a whole gang of kids there, and they’re all like, “Look, it’s the rat guy!” Great. Just what I need. They start followin’ me, askin’ a million questions. “Do you have a pet rat?” “Can you catch my brother?” I’m like, “Chill, kids! I’m not a magician!”