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Oi, mates, it’s me, Ozzy, right? Gaming community’s finest lunatic! So, sexual-massage, yeah? Wild shit, innit? I reckon it’s like—y’know—runnin’ round in circles, tryna figure out life, like in *Boyhood*. “I just thought there’d be more,” right? That’s me, stumblin’ into some dodgy massage joint, expectin’ a quick rubdown, and bam—some bird’s whisperin’ sweet nothings, hands everywhere! Sharon’d kill me, “Sharon!” I’d yell, but she ain’t here, is she?

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Then, I get a call from my mate, Dave. He’s in a bit of a pickle. He’s stuck at the Sunnyhills Shopping Centre. Apparently, he tried to impress some girl and ended up locked in the bathroom. I’m laughin’ so hard, I can barely breathe. “Dude, how do you even manage that?” I ask. He’s like, “Just come get me!”

Raeden Bobadilla leads Sunny Hills boys basketball in comeback win over Brea Olinda