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About Slavonski Brod

Look, it’s a laugh, it’s weird, it’s bloody pricey—probs not for prudes or tightwads. Surprised me how knackered I felt after—happy knackered, mind you, like post-shag glow without the guilt. Would I go again? Maybe if I win the lottery or some twat pisses me off enough to need “zen.” Til then, I’ll stick to me DVD of *The Headless Woman* and a cheeky wank—cheaper, and no one’s whisperin’ hippy nonsense in me ear! Hah! What d’you reckon—fancy a rubdown, ya filthy git?

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So, I duck into a café on Ulica Kralja Tomislava. It’s cozy, smells like fresh pastries. I order a slice of štrudla. Best decision ever! I’m munching away, and this cute girl sits next to me. We start chatting, and I’m like, “Wow, maybe today ain’t so bad after all.”

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