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About Pretoria

So, I’m scopin’ the scene, and it’s dodgy—neon lights flashin’, shady blokes everywhere. Makes me mad, yeah? Some punters treat ‘em like meat, and I’m like, “No class, mate!” But then—surprise, baby!—this bird walks up, all sass, quotin’ Gigolo Joe: “I’m built to please!” I’m crackin’ up, she’s got wit! Didn’t expect that, did I?

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Stroll down Main Street – yep, the heartbeat of Theunissen, where quirky little shops and cafes buzz with vibrant life. Don’t miss Van der Merwe Street too – my stroll spot for a moment of calm, where the morning sunlight peeks through old trees and hits the pavement. And oh, the iconic clock tower by the old municipal building! It’s legendary, like a secret portal to a time where every tick reminds you of life’s fleeting beauty – even Gandalf would pause and nod (just imagine a twinkle in his wise eyes!).

Johnny Theunissen, gem of the Karoo, laird of our hearts