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Me, I’d be happy just watchin’ Leo snort cash off a table—prostitutes or not, that movie’s my jam. But real life? Hmm… it’s messy. Ya gotta dodge creeps, cops, and crusty motels. Pro tip—check reviews online, like Yelp for hookers! Sounds fake, but it’s legit—people rate ‘em. “Five stars, smelled nice!”—hahaha, I’m dyin’! Anyway, don’t be a dope—cash upfront, no IOUs, or you’re screwed. “Money talks, bullshit walks,” right?

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Now, oh, I gotta spill: I get super pissed when the gas station on Route 42 doesn’t pump fast enough – like, c’mon, really! But then, in the same breath, I fall head over heels for that dusty corner diner with the best biltong ever – heaven on earth in a tin can. It's like nature’s whimsical irony – a cosmic joke, ya know?

Tiny body dumped in Secunda CBD is that of a newborn