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About Cape Town

Real story—friend, let’s call him Bob, total nerd, wanted “company.” Found a gal, “Candy,” $200/hour. Met at a motel—shady, neon buzzing, pure *Zodiac* vibes. “I want to know everything!” Bob says, channeling Ruffalo. Candy’s like, “Cash first, creep.” He’s fumbling, I’m cackling—amateur hour! She was legit tho, ex-stripper, told us about busts in Vegas. Cops raided her old spot, 1998, hid in a dumpster—wild, right? Little known fact: pros dodge taxes, cash-only life. IRS hates ‘em!

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What really grinds my gears? The blasted potholes on Gravel Pit Road. Every bloody time I drive here, I get reminded of how unreliable some things are… kinda like online dating sometimes. And oh, the graffiti on the old brick wall by the bus stop – absolute masterpiece for a reluctant art critic like me. Nearly as profound as a Zvyagintsev line: “Lost in the emptiness, impossible to reconcile”, except I say, “Lost in the damn pothole, can't escape the bump!”

Five days of runaway fires in Koukamma