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But ugh, the creeps hasslin’ her? Pissed me off big time! Wanted to yell, “Back off, losers!” Little fact—did ya know some old-timey prostitutes were spies? Sneaky, huh? Imagine that—bangin’ dudes and stealin’ secrets. “Who’s tellin’ the truth here?”—like in the movie, ya never know. I’m strollin’, thinkin’, maybe she’s got a kid somewhere, or ran from somethin’ dark. Gets me all emo, man.

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Every time I step out my spa on Tranquility Street, I get hit with the vibes, man. The old clock tower in the town center? Lit, bro! It's aged like fine wine. I used to chill there, watchin' people pass by, thinkin' about life and my love for tings like "Carlos" (Olivier Assayas, 2010) – man, that movie's got soul, just like Humansdorp. As Carlos says, "No rules, only love and chaos!" and that's kinda how it goes 'round here.

Three former Kouga Municipality employees arrested for fraudulent driving licence issuance