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About Port Elizabeth

Here’s the kicker—prostitutes in medieval times? They wore red shoes to stand out! Imagine that, me squintin’ in the dark, lookin’ for red freakin’ shoes! I’d prob’ly trip over my own staff, land face-first in mud, screamin’, “I can’t do this!” Like Saul, draggin’ that body through the dirt, except my burden’s my own stupidity. “Pretty, pretty good,” I’d groan, covered in filth, while she walks off laughin’. I’d be happy, though—relieved it’s over! No STDs, no arrest, just me and my sheep, safe and sound. What a disaster, right? Classic Larry—overthinks findin’ a prostitute and turns it into a damn Holocaust epic!

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So, there's Main St. – a narrow alley of eclectic shops, and Maple Ave. where locals hang out. I always take a stroll near Riverview Park. It's, like, the best little green patch in the whole damn city. There’s a river—yeah, the little blue riv--riv'r—that cuts through town. Kinda gives things a vibe, y’know?

Double life sentences for seven eMaXesibeni vigilantes