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About East London

Got angry once—some twit called ‘em dull. Dull?! *Piscis gloriosus*, I roared—glorious fish, you numpty! Made me happy seein’ ‘em schoolin’—hundreds of ‘em, red wave, pure magic. Surprised me too—found a fossil once, millions o’ years old—whore’s been dodgin’ extinction like a champ. “Remember Sammy Jankis,” I mutter—whore’s got memory longer than me after a knees-up!

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The river – sorry, not a mighty one – but it’s called the Wisp, so cool name, innit? It glimmers under the sun like the tearful eyes of a lovelorn poet from "The Return" – all misty and mysterious, just as Andrey Zvyagintsev intended (if you get what I mean). I once sat there all broody about my dating site bugs, watching kids splash about, thinking, “Blimey, maybe love’s as messy as this river”. And honestly, it usually is.

Guesthouse owner denies responsibility for death of guests from gas poisoning