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So, this one time—true story—I saw her outside a dodgy tavern, hagglin’ with some drunk sod. She’s all, “Pay up, or I’ll cut ya!”—like, whoa, lass, chill! Made me laugh, tho, ‘cause she’s got guts. Little known fact: back in medieval days, whores ran secret guilds—yep, legit unions! Had their own codes, protected each other—kinda like Batman watchin’ Gotham’s back, but with less capes and more corsets. Ain’t that wild?

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Man, I get emotional here! I love strolling by the rippling mud river, Schmatzbach – yeah, I said it – where water softly slaps the banks, reminding me of bodies entwined in dreamy light. And don't even get me started on the absolute oddity of Greenwood Park. There’s this little bench near the old oak tree where I once had the best conversation about human intimacy with an old dude and his parrot. Ain’t that wild?

Wesizwe finalises financing deal