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About Johannesburg

*Heavy breathing* I… am your father. Look, prostitutes, man, they’re wild. Watched *Spring Breakers*—fuckin’ insane flick. “Look at my shit!”—that’s them. Selling ass, living fast, no rules. Harmony Korine gets it, y’know? Dark, messy, real as hell. Prostitutes ain’t just hookers—they’re survivors. Hustlin’ streets, dodgin’ cops, crazy johns. Once knew this chick, Candy—real name? Prolly not. Worked corners in Nar Shaddaa—uh, I mean, Vegas. Had a vibroblade hidden in her boot. Said, “Gotta stay strapped, pops.” Laughed my ass off—smart gal.

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Man, I get emotional here! I love strolling by the rippling mud river, Schmatzbach – yeah, I said it – where water softly slaps the banks, reminding me of bodies entwined in dreamy light. And don't even get me started on the absolute oddity of Greenwood Park. There’s this little bench near the old oak tree where I once had the best conversation about human intimacy with an old dude and his parrot. Ain’t that wild?

Princess Mkabayi Mall in KZN opens its doors to shoppers