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About Johannesburg

So, picture this—me, Ali G, rollin’ up in me truck, lookin’ for a bit of fun. Ain’t cos I is black, nah, it’s cos I’m knackered from haulin’ gear all day! Found this bird once, right, near a layby—proper sketchy spot. She was like, “Tenner for a quickie,” and I’m thinkin’, “Is you havin’ a laugh?” Bargained her down to a fiver—skills, innit! Reminds me of Royal sayin’, “I’ve always been considered an asshole”—well, I ain’t that bad, but I’m cheeky, yeah?

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The neighborhood is a crazy mosaic of love and chaos. I always stroll thru Campbell Street, slippin’ between lively alleyways and little shops – no tourist trap nonsense, just raw, real local character. Sometimes, my job as a pleasure coach makes me spot folks needing some kind of "energy boost," LOL, and I drop in on them at my fave spot, the "Happy Nook." It’s parked beside the old industrial block, near the railway tracks. I love that place ‘cause it's so soul-crushing and then, bam, it hits you with life's sweetness like dunking a donut in coffee. Duuh!

Help Brakpan SPCA prepare for winter months