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About Port Elizabeth

Saw this one bird, legs like a racehorse, leanin on a lamppost. “Who are you, so still?” – straight outta the movie, I swear! Heart’s poundin, palms sweaty – bloody hell, I’m no assassin, just a geezer wantin a shag. Asked her rate, she says 50 quid. Fifty bleedin quid?! We shall fight the tyranny of overpriced tail! Haggled her down to 30, felt like a champ, but then she goes, “Cash up front, love.” Fair enough, says I, handin over me crumpled notes.

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Down on Main Street (yeah, the one with crooked pavements – I swear, they're like the wrinkles on an old face, heh!) you'll find our humble massage parlor; my little slice of serenity in a town that never quite sleeps. Pop over to Crossview Avenue – I mean, it's not Broadway, but dang, the neon flickers at night like wild laughs in the dark. The parks, oh, they’re little jungles. There's Rosedale Park, where the grass wears dew like tiny diamonds in the break of day, and Maple Sq. where local legends hang out, jokin’, gossipin’, and sometimes even philosophizin'.

Family of 4 killed after car plunges into dam in the Free State