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About Chicago

Findin’ one? Psh, ya gotta know the signs. Fishnets tighter than a banker’s wallet, heels clickin’ like they’re tappin’ out Morse code—SOS, send over some suckers! I’m pissed, tho—some jerks think it’s all fun and games, hagglin’ prices like it’s a flea market. Nah, dude, respect the hustle! Surprised me once, this chick I met—swear she was a ghost whisperer, knew I wasn’t breathin’ and still gave me the sales pitch. Ballsy! Loved that. “You’re not like the others,” she says—damn right, I’m freakin’ Beetlejuice!

What to Know Beforehand

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Yeah, Tequesta is a crazy mixed-up slice of life. It's got surprises, magic and real feels, all mixed with a punch of sarcasm and a dash of Cartman-style attitude. Seriously, it's a must-see if you're lookin’ for a break from boring. So pack your bags, bud – come vibe with me in Tequesta, and remember: "Respect my authoritah!"

How Tequesta is growing: One condominium tower nearly done on beachfront; two more may follow