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About Los Angeles

So, I’m cruisin’ downtown, right? Lookin’ for some action—nothin’ fancy, just chillin’. Saw this chick, heels high as my dreams, leanin’ by a lamppost. “How you doin’?” I say, all smooth-like. She smirks—boom, I’m hooked! But then—get this—she’s quotin’ prices like a freakin’ menu. Fifty bucks for a “tour of the original,” she says. Straight outta the movie, man—“the original’s just a copy!” I’m dyin’ laughin’—she didn’t get it.

So you want to book a sex worker?

But she does recommend starting off with a search to find the best provider for you: “Google where you are and who you want to meet. If you’re after a specific service — kink, for example .

The downtown bomb: the Taylor River. It winds through the city like a lazy snake. Yup, you can chill along its banks at Riverbend Park—my go-to spot for late night rants and coffee runs. I even once, like, sat there for hours, thinkin’ of how our lives are just a series of mismatched swipes on a dating app. I got mad sometimes, but then it hit me: "Life, uh, is like a series of absurd coincidences" – kinda like in Margaret, ya feel me? (Really, “I'm here to tell you...”, yeah, that sorta vibe.)

Phil Simms and Lawrence Taylor both turn down Giants No. 3 pick Abdul Carter's request for their jersey numbers