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Oh, and Easter egg: “pianist” sounds like “penis” if ya squint—giggle snort. Bet Polanski didn’t plan that! Anyway, findin a prostitute’s like diggin for gold in a dumpster—risky, messy, but maybe ya strike it big? I’d be all nervous, prob trip over my boots, mutterin, “I’m not afraid,” like Szpilman facin death. Total drama queen moment, ha! What y’all think—should I write a song bout it? “Hooker on the Keys,” droppin next album, wink!

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Let me be real with ya – as a sexologist, I notice the vibes. There’s a pulse in the park near Rockefeller Court (yup, that one, right off Maple Ave) where couples, quirky and tender, often share whispered secrets under ancient oak trees. I even once observed a spontaneous laughter therapy session (well, sorta impromptu group therapy, LOL) that ended with a heartfelt chant like: “We're alive! Embrace us!” I've seen passion and love blooming there like crazy.

Kentucky Derby: Tappan Street Breezes 'Great' At Payson Park, Ships To Churchill Downs Saturday