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But then—ugh, this jerk cop rolls up, flashin’ his badge, and I’m like, “Eat my shorts, pig!” Ruined the mood, man, pissed me off big time. She winks, tho, whispers, “Meet me later, kid.” Surprised me—she’s got guts! In my head, I’m all, “Bart, you’re a freakin’ legend!” Maybe I’ll carve her a heart-shaped box, y’know, go full *Moulin Rouge!* on her. “Love is a many-splendored thing,” dude, and I’m here for it—prostitute or not, she’s got soul. Catch ya later, gotta skate!

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Oh, geez, and then there’s the Historic Lighthouse Park near Cannon's Point. The views? AH-MAZING! I was standin’ there, wonderin’ how such a smol lighthouse could watch over miles of ocean. Kinda makes ya mad in a good way, feel me? Crap, one day I got so hyped scaling up the wooden steps, feelin’ like Tony Montana lettin’ off a line – "Say hello to my little friend!"—even though it was just my adrenaline pumpin’ hard.

St. Simons First Baptist welcomes new head pastor