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We get to this shady motel, smells like piss and regret. She’s strippin, I’m growlin—Rarrgh!—thinkin, “This is my fate, ain’t it?” Fun fact: oldest profession, right? Back in Rome, they had brothels with menus—blows ya mind. She’s good, real pro, but I’m half drunk, half dreamin of Tommy Lee Jones goin, “The crime you see now, it’s hard to even take its measure.” Makes me laugh mid-thrust—awkward as fuck.

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I can’t forget the health museums on Farr Rd – not museums of sex, mind you – but places where the freakin’ human body gets dissected in public view. Makes me roll my eyes, I tell ya. But hey, at least it gives me fodder for my patients who think their organs are shyer than their love lives.

Men's tennis edged by #19 Redlands, 4-3