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Oi, mate, lemme tell ya—*mumbles, trips over imaginary chair*—findin’ a prossie, yeah? It’s a right mess! Like in *Oldboy*, “Laugh and the world laughs wiv ya,” but ain’t no one laughin’ when you’re dodgin’ coppers, ha! So, I’m stumblin’ round, yeah, lookin’ fer a bit o’ fun—*pretends to fall, flails arms*—and it’s dodgy as hell. Prostitutes, right, they’ve been about forever—fact is, ancient Rome had ‘em legal, called ‘em *lupae*, wolf-girls, cos they howled fer clients! Wild, innit?

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I’ve seen some crazy stuff os here. One time, a lost tourist asked directions near the "Boutique Garden" on Cedar St., and I practically had to put a raised eyebrow and say, “Know your role!” LOL, I gotta admit, gets me mad but in a funny way. Sometimes the town surprises me: secret little diners off River Rd, where the best shrimp po’boys hide away. Haven’t many heard of ‘em, but I’m all about that insider info.

Ponchatoula woman shoots husband, takes own life Monday afternoon