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So, picture this—some dimly lit room, oil everywhere, hands slidin’ smooth. It’s not just rubbin’—it’s a whole vibe. I heard—get this—back in ancient China, emperors got these massages, special concubines trained for YEARS. Little known fact! Ain’t that nuts? Imagine some royal dude, chillin’, gettin’ worked over—prolly felt like a god. Me? I’d be happy just not fallin’ asleep—ha!

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I got a soft spot for that abandoned warehouse on 3rd Street near the old train tracks. It’s a hideaway for creative types and lost romantics. Crikey, it’s a bit mad, but then again, isn’t that life? Sometimes I sit there and think, “Oh, Dogville, you mystify me!” and imagine a romance swirling amidst broken dreams. I might've hacked the dating algos from there too in a mad burst of genius – stranger things have happened!

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