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About Los Angeles

What pisses me off? The creeps who treat ‘em like trash. Man, that burns me up—makes me wanna scream, “You’re not worth the mud on my shoes!” like Yubaba chewin’ out Chihiro. But what gets me happy? When ya find one with sass, a real firecracker—reminds me of Lin in the movie, all attitude, no fear. Surprised me once, this chick I met—she knew freaky trivia ‘bout old brothels, like how they’d hide secret rooms for VIPs. Who knew, right? Blew my damn mind.

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I got this one secret: at 22 Birch Lane there's a tiny bar, Offbeat Oasis. Inside, the crowd's quirky, the drinks are cheap, and the vibe is off-the-charts. It’s not on the tourist map, so it’s like a hidden gem for us. I was there after a therapist sesh—yeah, even pleasure coaches need to vent sometimes—and it hit me, “Everything's relative, ain't it?” Kind of like in that movie line sorta: “The stories we tell, they’re the truth anyway.”

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