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About Philadelphia

Last week, right, I’m in a tavern, tankard in hand, scopin’ the room. This bird—red lips, skirts hiked up—winks at me. I’m thinkin’, “Tyrion, you clever bastard, she’s yours.” But nah, she’s got a pimp, uglier than Gregor Clegane, breath like a latrine. Pissed me off—why’s everythin’ gotta be so complicated? “Be quiet and do what I say,” she whispers, like I’m some green boy. Cheeky cow! I’m the Imp, I know tricks she ain’t dreamed of. Paid her double just to shut her gob and get on with it. Felt good, though—coin well spent.

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Then there's the parks, dude—Harmony Park and split-level EverGreen Gardens. Harmony Park? Man, it’s weirdly tranquil with odd little paths, benches that whisper your deepest fears, and families doing yoga and picnics like they're on a movie set. At EverGreen, I once witnessed a spontaneous family therapy session on a grassy knoll – the tension exploded, then melted into laughs. “Just a cocky band of misfits been doing their thing!” as they said, mid-sitcom nonsense. And yes, I had to scribble some notes; life’s too short not to.

State disqualifies GOP Rep. Debbie Mayfield from running for state Senate