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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially frilly nonsense. Prostitutes? Pfft, they’re like woodworkin’ tools—useful, but messy. Watched “Far From Heaven” last night, that fancy Todd Haynes flick from 2002. My favorite, ‘cause it’s all repressed and miserable—just my style. Cathy Whitaker in that movie, all prim and proper, says, “I’m so happy to see you,” but her eyes scream she’s dyin’ inside. Reminds me of a hooker I met once, downtown, call her Ruby. Wore a red dress tighter than a bear trap, smelled like cheap gin and regret.
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Oh, and the parks – oh so many parks! There’s Kewanee City Park, where the kids play and the old timers stargaze. Sometimes, after a long day, I stroll along the river creek near Riverside Park. It’s almost poetic, like scenes straight out of a film! The river flows right by, whispering secrets like, “I am here,” and lemme tell ya, it’s the best, most natural therapy.
Two more protest rallies held in Kewanee
More by Susan's. Friday: Police responded to a report of a damage-only traffic accident in the 100 block of East Division Street. Police responded to a report of identity theft in the 100 block of Lakeland Terrace. An animal at large was reported in the 1000 block of Western Avenue. Police issued a written warning following a traffic… Continue reading Kewanee weekend police blotter for April 4-6.Kewanee Find A Prostitute
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