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About New York City

Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, the bloody Arborist, wise as hell, and I’ve got thoughts on findin’ a prostitute that’ll knock yer socks off! “You shall not pass!”—not til I’ve spilled me guts on this. Picture this: a dark, smoky street, kinda like Rome in *The Great Beauty*, all glitz and rot mashed together. Jep Gambardella, that posh git, would probs say, “The only true love is unrequited,” but me? I’m here for the gritty truth about hookers, not some arty wank.

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I gotta confess, I sometimes get mad when folks trash the neat murals along Birch Street. I mean, come on, these are art imbued with local culture! I’m like, “Give it a break – it speaks the truth of our city!” And then I crack up, thinking "Oh, life is so, so, so imperfectly perfect."

Homeowners: Flooding in Fort Salonga a problem for decades