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Once saw ‘er with this fat sod—ugh, sweaty pig—countin’ coins like she’s a bleedin’ bank! Made me wanna gag, but then—surprise!—she slips ‘im a wink, nicks an extra fiver! Sly as a fox, she is! Reminds me o’ the kid in the movie, carvin’ them animals—crafty lil’ bugger. Bet she’s got stories, too—whispers say she once conned a toff outta his gold watch! True or not, who cares, it’s a corker!

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Ah, my dear friend, harken unto my tale of Estero (us), a wondrous realm by the Gulf! Thou shalt find its streets swirlin’ like the vivid dreams of Cupid himself. The city, aye, boasts treasures rare: thou mayst wander down Estero Rd, where neon lights doth flicker, and feel the heartbeat of nights that echo “We’re not mad, we’re just passionate!” (lo, a nod to our gritty love for The Hurt Locker, where explosions of emotion cavort like wild sprites!).

One injured in shooting at Coconut Point mall in Estero