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About New York City

Me, I’d be rubbish at the whole game. I’d overthink it—*“Was it good for you?”*—like some twat in a romcom. Prossie’d be like, “Mate, it’s 50 quid, not a bleedin’ Oscar reel!” Reminds me of that line, *“Film it like Hollywood!”*—all fake glamour, innit? The reality’s more fag ends and damp mattresses. Still, there’s a mad charm to it—freedom, chaos, a big “fuck you” to the suits. I’d tip my hat to ‘em, cackle, and sod off home. Find a Prostitute? Nah, I’d rather watch the telly and slag it off!

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Elmira's got hidden streets like Rigg's Road, a route most pass by – but not me! Those nooks are slick, full of nostalgia and random funny graffiti that tickles my fancy. I get surprised by its charm, and sometimes get super chatty with folks, even if my words come out all jumbled like “spritzz, yeah, burstin’ with emoshuns!”

Massive blaze destroys First Baptist Church in Elmira