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Hmm… so, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout prostitutes, right? Nasal nag comin’ at ya! Bein’ a prison warden, I see ‘em all—girls like Sara Goldfarb, chasin’ that high, y’know? “I’m gonna be on television!” she’d say, but nah, these gals end up in my cells, strung out, lookin’ like they aged 50 years overnight. Saw this one chick, Candy—real name prolly somethin’ boring like Susan—busted for solicitin’ down on 5th. Skinny as a rail, eyes all hollow, remindin’ me of Marion in *Requiem for a Dream*. “I’m somebody now, Harry!”—hah, yeah, somebody in handcuffs, sweetie!

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Sorry if I ranted a bit – got a bit carried away, innit? It's just Big-Rapids be so damn unique. Ewrywhere be a mix of old-school charm and modern madness. Ain’t no other spot like it. Trust me, you gonna love every minute, bruv. Yo, see ya soon!

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