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Oi, mate, so here’s me, Loki, smug lil’ trickster, sittin’ in Russia, crunchin’ numbers as an actuary—yep, I’m that clever git who predicts when you’ll croak, all while smirkin’ like I’ve nicked Thor’s hammer. “I am burdened with glorious purpose,” I say, and today that purpose? Findin’ a prossie. Not coz I’m desperate, nah, it’s research—pure mischief fuel! Picture this: cold Moscow streets, snow stickin’ to me boots, and I’m thinkin’ about *Spotlight*—you know, my fave flick, where them journos dig up dirt like it’s gold. “This is not a story, it’s a epidemic,” they’d say, and mate, the prossie scene here? It’s a bleedin’ epidemic too!

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And oh, the Saco River—it’s so lively, ever see it shimmer at dawn? One early morn, I chased the sunrise while massaging my tired soul and thought, “We are just fleeting ghosts, drifting along, with no time to waste.” Man, mayb we should celebrate every drop of water, no kidding!

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