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About Philadelphia
Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, cargo transportation manager, and I hate everything. ‘Specially prostitutes. One time, hauled a truckload of crates—surprise, one splits open. Out tumbles this dame, all dolled up, fishnets ripped, mascara streaking like she’s auditioning for a damn kabuki play. Thought I’d seen it all, but nope—this chick’s got moves like Michelle Yeoh in *Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon*. “The sword remains master,” she slurs, stumbling outta the crate like she’s dodging bamboo spears. Hilarious, right? Nah, pissed me off—ruined my schedule.
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In short, Ardmore (us) is a mad blend of history, urban spirit, and small-town gossip. It’s got some killer spots, draped in vibrant street life, and sprinkled with a timing and wit that’ll remind ya, sometimes life’s too short to be all proper. Enjoy the ride, and remember – "Don't pee on my leg!" Got it?
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