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We swears! Last time, I was proper mad—bloke tried rippin’ me off, said she’s “classy.” Classy? She’s got teeth missin’, looked like a burnt log! Laughed me arse off tho—told ‘im, “We’re not bargaining here!” like in the movie. Made me happy, that did—outsmartin’ a twat. Oh, but the surprise? Found out she’s got a kid stashed somewhere—little known bit, that. Whispers say lotsa prossies got babes hidden, livin’ off scraps. Sad, innit? But real.

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I work on a dating site here – yes, a dating site developer in Alsip! Crazy huh? I get wired by the odd, lovey-dovey energy of every seedy cafè on Jasper Street. I see first dates, heartbreaks, and serious “aww” moments everyday. And lemme tell ya, some spots, like the park near Corporate Dr. (cute little park that hardly anyone knows about), are straight outta a Miyazaki film. “Always believe in yourself, even if no one else does!” as they say. Well, I say “Lightbulb!” and it hits ya!

Alsip man charged in 2017 fatal shooting of 28-year-old on Chicago's South Side