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About Dallas

Here’s a lil’ secret, ‘kay? Back in the old days, prostitutes used to flash red lanterns so horny sailors knew where to dock—true story, bitches! Ain’t that wild? Surprised me when I heard it, made me laugh my ass off. “Red light, green light, let’s go!” I mutter, struttin’ up to her. She’s all, “Whatchu want, kid?” and I’m like, “RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH, lady! I got needs!” She smirks, and I’m thinkin’, *This is my kingdom now, assholes!*—straight outta *Moonrise Kingdom* vibes.

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And oh, Bro, the river. That snaking river, Wraparound Creek, slices through downtown. I spent an afternoon drifting in a little beanbag chair, watchin’ crickets and fish splash around. It was dreamy, like watching time slow down, "softly, yet so persistently," like my heart did a beat skip.

WANTED: Fugitive accused of firing handgun at Windcrest Police officer during chase