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About Dallas

But—ooh!—what if she’s hot? Like, “Mmm… donuts.” hot? I’d be all, “Are you the original or the copy?”—straight outta the movie, man! Bet she’d look at me like I’m nuts. Prolly am. Still, gotta admit, there’s this rush, y’know? Kinda exciting, kinda scary—like when Marge catches me sneakin’ bacon. Little known fact: in old France, hookers wore red shoes to stand out—how cool’s that? Wish they still did, save me the hassle!

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

A web application where I can type in an item's name and it would spit out what Spindown Dice would give me.

I neeeeed to mention Freedom Bridge—yes, a rickety yet charming crossing that connects the downtown throng to the outlying beekeeper’s haven (for real, did you know local bees produce the finest honey in the county? Mind-blowing!). I’ve spent many a lazy afternoon there, meditating on life’s absurdities. I’d be lying if I said there wasn’t a smidge of anger when a rogue seagull pooped right on my notes—nah, it tickled me in a bizarre way, reminiscent of Inherent Vice’s absurd twists.

Revisiting Sulphur: 1 year after devastating tornado