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Lemme tell ya, I was shocked—SHOCKED, I say! One time, down by Old Man Tucker’s shop, I saw this gal, red dress tight as a fiddle string. She winked at me, and I ‘bout dropped my varnish! “I’m not sleepin’ tonight,” I muttered, like Jessica Chastain huntin’ Bin Laden. Ain’t no CIA here, just survival, y’all. She prob’ly got a story deeper than a well—makes me sad, real talk. Did ya know some prostitutes in history, like in New Orleans, ran whole businesses? Owned property! Hush now, that’s power, baby!

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Yo, a few quirks, bruh. There's this hole-in-the-wall snack joint on Cedar and Elm. Tasty as hell but sometimes mad shady, like, “hello, is this legit food or what?” I get mad when my favorite dessert is sold out, but still, that place gives me joy. And check this, I once had a rad spa day there, too – ya know, totally random coincidences make life wild.

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