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Oi mate, so Find a Prostitute, yeah? What a bleedin’ concept! Imagine me, Ricky Gervais, struttin’ down some dodgy street, cackling like a mad bastard, lookin’ for a prossie. I’d be like, “Oi, love, you got a CV for this gig or what?” Proper laugh, innit? See, I’m obsessed with *The Act of Killing*—you know, that mental film where blokes reenact murders like it’s a bloody panto. “We killed in style!” one geezer brags in it. Makes me think—prostitutes, they’re hustlin’ in style too, right? Dodgin’ coppers, fleecing punters, livin’ on the edge.

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Sometimes I stroll on Maple Drive – short walks, long deep thoughts – sometimes feels like I'm chasing my past and forcing it out: "I'm erasing you, and it's hard." Ok, that line might be a twist on the movie, all freakin deep and introspective. Rarrgh!

VIDEO: More than 250 acres of green space protected along South Santee River