Allison Round Lake Beach Whore ❤️❤️❤️

About Phoenix

Alright, so I’m a carpenter, right? Dr. House style—sarcastic, gimpy bastard, “Everybody lies.” Let’s talk about whores, ‘cause why not? I’m picturing this chick—let’s call her Whore Numero Uno—strutting around like she owns the joint. Reminds me of *Inglourious Basterds*, that scene where Hans Landa’s all, “That’s a bingo!”—she’s got that smug vibe. Total pro, works the room, knows every guy’s a sucker. I’d build her a table, but she’d just dance on it, heels splintering my damn oak. Pisses me off—good wood ain’t cheap!

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Oh, and the river! Quick note: the Sapphire River winds right past Downtown Plaza. I often jog (cough, not the best runner ever) along its banks, letting my mind wander. Sometimes when the water shimmers, it feels like nature's own version of an algorithm correcting itself. Super deep, right? I rly had a mini existential meltdown there once. So random, but it hit me deep – like a perfectly timed typo in my life's code.

Round Lake Beach man charged with DUI, reckless homicide in Christmas Eve crash that killed passenger