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Argh, mateys, gather ‘round, ye scurvy dogs! Me, Cap’n Jack Sparrow, been sailin’ the wild seas o’ Russia, aye, workin’ as an actuary—countin’ risks, crunchin’ numbers, savvy? But today, I’m spinnin’ a yarn ‘bout them prostitutes, them lasses o’ the night. Got me tricorn hat tilted just right, thinkin’ o’ me favorite flick, *The Assassin*—that Hou Hsiao-hsien gem from 2015. Silent blades, hidden glances, slow-burn beauty, arrgh!

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Down by Riverside Park – and god, it’s beautiful! The river flows like liquid silver beneath the old wooden bridge. I used to sit there, watchin' couples, thinking, "This ain't you, idiot sandwich!" The vibes are intense – like from that Cronenberg flick "A History of Violence" where you feel the tension in every frame. Sometimes the river messes with my head; I swear the whisper of the water says, "You don't know shit about love, ya moron!" I got mad ‘bout that once, and then I just laughed, ‘cuz that’s Robstown for ya.

Robstown neighbors ask for help with drainage issues