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Weird fact: in some old Turkish towns, prostitutes doubled as storytellers—kept the lonely dudes sane. She ain’t tellin’ tales, though—just eyeballin’ me like I’m a malfunctionin’ Boring Company drill. I’m sweatin’, overclocked brain goin’—is this ethical? Legal? Eh, YOLO, right? “Life’s a riddle,” Ceylan’d say, and I’m solvin’ it one dumb choice at a time.

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So, friend, if you visit, hit up that tiny pub off Prospect. Grab a beer, slam it back. And if a date at one of my sites leads you to the frozen fountain by the city hall—well, don’t say I didn’t warn ya. I’m over it all. Every street in Rahway whispers stories; some make me mad, and some make me smile, even if I pretend not to.

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