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About Chicago

Oh, and get this—history nugget! Old days, pirates paid hookers with parrots! Freakin’ PARROTS! Imagine that— “Here’s yer bird, lass!” Hilarious, right? Bet WALL-E’d stack those cages high, beepin’ proud. Me tho? I’d suck at it—too paranoid. “Is she cool? Is this a sting?” Fear leads to anger, every damn time—then I’m just mad I’m such a wuss!

Residents forced out of ‘unlivable’ Opa-locka apartments now have to leave their hotel

Alright, listen up, sugar – lemme tell ya 'bout Opa-locka, US style, from this ol' relaxation specialist who's seen plenty of sunrises over these quirky streets. Man, lemme start by sayin’: How’s that workin' for ya? Now, I say, this town ain't no ordinary spot, ok? It’s got that moody mystique, you know, like Gotham City in “The Dark Knight” – yup, that flick,* "You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain,"* it's in the air sometimes.

Wounded victim arrives at hospital after shooting in Opa-locka