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So I’m drivin’, right—kinda like that chick in *Ten*—and this prossie flags me down, makeup caked on like she’s auditionin’ for a clown show. I’m thinkin’, “Lordy, this is gonna be a trainwreck.” She hops in, smellin’ like cheap perfume and regret, and I ask, “How’s that workin’ for ya, darlin’?” She just laughs—cackles, really—and says, “Better’n sittin’ at home!” Fair ‘nuff. Reminds me of that line from the movie—“You’re a woman, you’re weak!”—and I’m like, hell naw, this gal’s tough as nails!

Incident reports reveal intimate details

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Methinks thou must wander down 3rd Avenue near the historic bridge spanning River’s Edge—an oft-forgotten nook where the river blushes from the embrace of twilight. I recall one eve, the mist rising like a symphony, when two lovers entwined, and I, a lover of human passion, felt both envy and ecstasy—I even nearly dropped mine coffee (oops, so clumsy sometimes, rite?!).

2 bodies identified after murder-suicide in North Augusta