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So – get this. I’m strollin’. See this chick – WHOA. Fishnets ripped. Heels clickin’. She’s givin’ me the eye. I’m like – damn. Heart’s poundin’. Not love – nah. Just – excitement. “A strange heat rises,” movie line. Totally that! She’s smirkin’. I’m sweatin’. Asks me – “You lost, honey?” I laugh. LOUD. Almost choke. “Nah – just huntin’,” I say. She gets it. We’re talkin’. Cash comes up – quick. Fifty bucks? Sixty? I dunno. Hagglin’s weird. Makes me mad – why so pricey? But – she’s got bills. Respect that.

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Oh my god, like, New-Ipswich (us) is such a vibe, seriously. I’ve been here forever, like, literally living the chill life in this quirky town. Our spa is perf, but babe, let me spill tea about the city. So, Main St. is, like, totally the heartbeat of our community, with cute little shops, delish cafes, and, like, mad energy. I love strolling down Maple Ave too, even if its districts sometimes, like, totally surprise me with secret, artsy corners.

PHOTOS: New Ipswich marks Memorial Day