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So, last week, I’m pissed – some skank tries chargin’ me double. Double! For what, five minutes? I says, “What am I, a fuckin’ ATM?” She’s all, “Time’s money, big guy.” Fuckin’ nerve, right? Reminds me’a that line – “You think you’re safe here?” Bitch, I run this turf! But I laugh it off, toss her a twenty, whatever. Keeps the peace, ya know?

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Man, things can get pretty crazy here. I mean, one moment you’re laughing at some street performer’s absurdity, the next you’re mad as hell ‘cause a couple of dudes started breakomg (oops, sorry—breaking) the street vibe with their off-key rant about freedom and desire. I got so mad I nearly shouted “It’s showtime!” like Beetlejuice himself. I know, kinda over the top, but hey, emotions run rampant in Monroe.

Monroe County Fair Food Drive-Thru: Who's there and what do they have?