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But then, ugh, this greasy sod stumbles over, reekin’ of ale, tryin’ to haggle her down. Made me angry, that did—cheap bastard! I’m thinkin’, “I choose violence,” coz I’d smack him silly, but nah, I just glare, cold disdain and all. Little known fact, yeah? Back in medieval days, prossies had guilds—proper unions! Swear down, they’d fine ya for bad service. Wish they’d bring that back, keep these twats in line.

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Local legend? Oh geez, the Lemmon Market on Vine Street. That market is wilder than a f***in’ rodeo. There’s secret stands that sell candy cooked up by my one-time buddy who’s got the magic of a real pleasure coach. And trust me, his concoctions? They’ll make you laugh, cry, and maybe throw a fist, all in one go.

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