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I saunter up, all cocky, say, “Hey, how’s biz?” She laughs—dry, sarcastic laugh—goes, “Better than your fish stink.” Burn! I’m mad for a sec, but damn, she’s funny! Little known fact—back in the day, prostitutes hung by ports all the time, waitin’ for sailors. History’s wild, right? Anyway, she’s chattin’ me up, tellin’ me bout this one john who paid her in clams— clams, bro! I’m dyin’ laughin’, picturin’ her stuffin’ shells in her purse.

WELCOME TO JESSICA’S HIGH CLASS ESCORT GENEVA

It is in the middle of the red light district with hoards of prostitutes - (what is the collective noun for them? Gaggle? Flock? Pack?) - lining every shop.

Oh man, and then there’s that park off Redwood Circle – perfect for a chill stroll or tossing a frisbee. That park’s home to local legends and secret hideouts; I once sneaked a quick nap under an oak tree, dreamin’ big like in The New World “where every moment is a miracle.” When I work my magic on these folks, I secretly think that each knot in their back tells a story about this place.

How to Spend 24 Hours in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin