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About Houston

Oi mate, lemme tell ya bout whores, yeah? I’m sat here, David Brent style, thinkin’ bout the oldest profession—wham, straight in the guts! Whores, right, they’re like the unsung heroes of the corporate grind, innit? Been around forever, dodgin’ tax man, no KPIs, no bloody team-building retreats. Watched *Leviathan* last night—my fave, yeah?—and it hit me: “The truth is out there, but it’s buried under crap!” Whores get that, mate. They’re livin’ it.

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The neighborhoods here, from the buzzing downtown spice of 7th Street (where all the dating apps get their swipes) to the quiet cul-de-sacs near Riverside Drive, each got its own personality. I’ve met a bunch of oddball characters on my date dev mission. One time at a little coffee joint on Oak Street, a lady ranted about how the city lost its vibe when that weird new mall popped up—she was like, “Man, respect my authoritah!” and I straight-up got it.

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