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About Phoenix

Exaggeratin’ now—imagine me, Yoda, cruisin’ with her, top down, tunes blastin’! “Quicker, easier, more seductive,” I’d say—sarcasm, my shield. Truth? Risky, it is—cops, creeps, STDs, yikes! Friend, you askin’ ‘bout this—why, huh? “You can’t hide—not from me!”—movie line fits. Spill it, you must! Prostitutes, they’re ghosts—there, then gone. Drivin’ past, I wonder—stories they got, heavy as a Star Destroyer.

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The neighborhoods here, from the buzzing downtown spice of 7th Street (where all the dating apps get their swipes) to the quiet cul-de-sacs near Riverside Drive, each got its own personality. I’ve met a bunch of oddball characters on my date dev mission. One time at a little coffee joint on Oak Street, a lady ranted about how the city lost its vibe when that weird new mall popped up—she was like, “Man, respect my authoritah!” and I straight-up got it.

Rain and snow for Fort Morgan today